What's Love Got to Do With It?

So - What's love got to do with it? What do we really mean when we use this word? I can remember a time, not so long ago - yet in someways a life time ago - when I believed in the magic of this word without reservation. 

Of course that was before the revelation that came into the magic Kingdom of Not, in which I had invested myself - the urgent proclamation that instantly corrected this definition for me.  It became brutally and bluntly clear that the meaning of this word is quite different for a man than it is for a woman.  Of course, I held in my memory examples of the Kingdom's old definition, where this expression meant a bond where one would care for another above themselves, make decisions based on how they would affect the other - you get the idea - the antiquated ideal of partnership that equated to the definition of love - before the proclamation in the Kingdom of Not.  This proclamation that simply redefined love as a word used between the sexes as an excuse to get into bed.

It became clear that trust could be placed in the love between parent and child and when one is truly lucky between friends and family members where that bond is strong enough to last and hold its own.  Perhaps it is a part of our society's changing times - not a good change I fear.  But now it seems that people see the world as centered around themselves and only break this mold at the core of family, and those extended friends that become family.  Somehow this just doesn't extend to lovers, no matter that this intimacy moves beyond so many barriers, the phrase "I Love You" has become equal to "I Love Having Sex With You."  And when this passion ebbs, so then the "love" and the relationship - until the couples part. 

It is a harsh world to live in.  Knowing that your perspective is likely to be so different from your partner's.  It is harsh to lie there wondering if the words they give you have meaning beyond the physical pleasure of the moment - or even the chance to extend that pleasure to the next.  The philosopher's have spoken so often of the boundaries that we have with langage.  Our inability to truly know another, and hence the knowledge that we are always alone.  It is this I think that drives us to find others to be with.   Yet it is also what prevents us from understanding if we have found that person to be with.  Especially in the fabric of the world we live in today - where gratification has paved the way to the loose use of a word that is meant to express the most deep and intricate of emotions. 

It is so much easier to recognize the face of love when it is not obscured by passion.  Yet passion is such an essential part of being a couple that one can become consumed with doubt when "LOVE" is placed into the equation.  I asked someone recently how they knew they loved someone.  At first they looked like a deer caught in the headlights, or someone faced with a test that they had no means of passing.  Finally, the answer came, "I just know."  It was said with eyes clear and open and with a steady full voice, no whispers and no doubts, not in the heat of passion and not with concern that the object of their passionate affection might leave.  And I believed them.  For the first time since the urgent declaration was issued, I found myself believing in a present tense couple operating on that antiquated definition of love. 

I wonder then, when will the Kingdom of Not issue a new proclamation, that redefines this word yet again and paves the way for trust, comfort and belief ? Soon I hope - very soon - I think it will make for a much happier world - one I would really like my children to experience as they expand past family to find their own places, homes and hearths

What's Love Got to Do With It? - Just about everything in the end - It's all about your perspective - and that of the person you are with - Here's to the chance that these might be close to the same view afterall.